Greg Murat (mur-rah)
Journal December 2004
Happy birthday Dale! We love you!
December 30, 2004
I heard from Sharon & Clay in Chicago, our friends we met in Cabo San Lucas. It is good to hear from friends and there are those people you meet in your life who are instant old and cherished friends. I am grateful to the people who take the time to read the poems and journal entries. I hope it is more in number than the number of emails we get. I plan on making some changes to the site in the new year and possibly taking down some pages like the CD page. It isn't generating any interest or sales to date so I think we will go with a different approach in the new year.
We will have a new addition to our household this summer: a new baby. It is not something I would have ever thought would happen and I am still processes the information. I am grateful a new life has a chance to walk the planet and strive to find their way back home. Stormy seas have descended on our shores and I hope the weather will clear soon so there is a place of tranquility when the new tiny person arrives. I am sure there will be however it occurs and whatever it takes. Who knows what lies ahead?
I was up till midnight in the studio with the assistance of Rob Peebler as engineer and we are finally approaching finishing one song. It was really fun to record with Rob because he brought up a stunning mix and it is a true inspiration to sing when the band sounds really good. Mike Daily was over for several hours and he and Jimmy did some harmonies and so did I. The next two days I plan to really go after the vocals and make them tell the story that is lying waiting in the lyrics. Thanks for your time and I hope the new year makes love is kind a true statement.
December 29, 2004
Andie listens to the news and says, "It's happening." She is referring to all the things predicted so many years ago in the Bible, wars, rumors of wars, earthquakes, floods and all the other natural disasters and all that signifies the end times. Whatever your beliefs, there is a great deal of strife and suffering in the world. The latest events resulting from the tsunamis is beyond our comprehension. It really makes the day to day seem trivial when you think about the losses people have incurred over the last few days since Christmas. I know that part of the struggle with the blues that I have at this time is over the state of the world and especially the conflict in Iraq. I have empathy for the people who live their and our men and women in harms way who are serving in whatever capacity. It dredges up the feelings from Viet Nam and weighs heavy on my heart every single day. I speak of it almost not at all, but I feel it in my bones. Lord have mercy. I think life is very precious and so easy to take for granted. Each day that passes leaves me grateful for the chance to live on this planet for a time, although I will be so ready to leave when my time is done. Peace.
December 28, 2004
The essence of pain is a powerful thing. Pain in the the back, pain in the neck, pain wherever tends to dominate the thoughts in your head. I don't mind pain but muscle spasms are somewhat like electrical shocks and tend to immobilize a person. So I am feeling nonfunctional today. I am going to work and rest at the same time. I had a flat tire this morning and I don't mean the beer. It is a low back pain day but we were on the Washington coast Sunday morning and thank God no tsunami hit our shores. God bless the people in the world suffering from that terrible devastation. I heard it was two to five minutes from start to finish. Lives were over and or forever altered in those moments. One never knows what the future holds. One never knows.
December 26, 2004
We have weathered another Christmas. It has been a somewhat strange season with many people saying the spirit passed them by. It is always a warm and comfortable time at our house with family and friends. Faith and Andie cooked a wonderful prime rib dinner. Josh and Christina came from Oregon. Liz and I completed the roster of people present. It was a small gathering for our clan. Chani is quite sick with the flu and in Fairbanks Alaska. She called and seems to be doing well except for the illness. Freedom called from Nebraska where he is visiting and said is was freezing but good. We spent Christmas evening with Sarah and had a peaceful time. Hot tubbed at night and in the morning. It was just fine all in all.
Musically speaking things are going well I think I will talk about that more in the newsletter but I made some hardware changes and Silent T is humming along for the first time ever with out any glitches. I am working on the vocals for the new CD's. Mike Daily has put in a cazillion hours at the console at Studio 04 and we are fast approaching time for mixing.
I talked to my sister Maria, who is also sick and that was good. She gave me some free medical advise on my back, which is flaring up again from when I fell and broke a vertebrae. It is not my favorite. Who likes pain. I told Andie that God really blesses me because even though I may need a crane to get up and sit down and the pain is so bad I can hardly move, it stops when I am playing an singing. Of course, then it returns, but I wouldn't be able to play without that interlude, so thanks God. That is my story and I am sticking to it.
December 24, 2004
Merry Christmas. I said Merry Christmas, not happy holidays. Merry Christmas!
I got the most wonderful surprise this morning. I was speaking Whinese to Andie. "Nobody ever calls us. We don't have any friends." The phone rang and it was our very dear friend Bill McDaniel. He was in the spirit and hilarious and what a joy it was to talk to him. We go way back to the days of the Banana Brothers. It was not really a surprise that he called after the statement I had made to Andie. Bill and I have a special connection. I remember a time sitting in the Leopold Hotel in Bellingham after a gig. We were sitting around I was playing the guitar and we were all singing. I sang a song called Wasn't It A Time that I had just written. Bill sang harmony on the chorus and said "I love that song, how long have you been playing it?" I said, "I just wrote it." He knew the words and sang the harmony although he had never heard it before. That is the magic of life and one of the moments I will always cherish. We talked about the love and joy we have in our families and how we are both very blessed that way. He invited us down to San Diego and we are going to plan a trip there early in the new year. By the way, I was just kidding about not having any friends. We have the best friends in the world. God bless us every one. Have a very Merry Christmas, it is the happy holiday when we celebrate the birth of Christ. E-mail Us
December 22, 2004
There's not much to say today and too much to do. I may have to take a break for a bit. I am running on a low tank of fuel. It is Christmas in just a couple of days and more than any other season in my memory I have been oblivious to its coming. I don't really know why. But Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you all. It is the season for drawing near to the ones we love. May yours be lovely and bring peace in the coming year.
I left the studio last night very early, about 8:30 with Ronnie, Jimmy and Mike working away. I just felt spent. We are making great progress and Mike is quite the task master and keeps us on track. I think I just need a little rest and relaxation to recoup my strength so I can bring some energy into the project. I will get there. So many people have been pouring their hearts into this recording. I am humbled and thankful. I just heard one of Scott MacGougan's tracks for the first time last night. He rocks. So once again Happy holidays until next time. God Bless.
December 21, 2004
Back to the beach, that is the first thing that pops into my head today. It is Christmas in just a few days and I am thinking of warm sun and sandy beaches. What are you gonna do? Just get into whatever it is we have to do, I guess that is the plan here on this shortest day of the year and the longest night. The sun sets at 4:30 in the afternoon. How strange is that? Manolito is in Mexico and Randy and Terri are about to leave for Florida and here we are in the great Northwest. But it is a lovely place to live. I picked Sarah up at the Bus Station last night and she is looking very healthy and lovely. She has been working on her films and she is planning on going away to school next year in a warmer place to further her film making skills.
December 20, 2004
It was a wild and busy weekend. Saturday night was a bit of the Twilight Zone at Provs. It was fun with several people Andie invited. Bob Marcure sat in most of the first long set playing yukelele. He was hilarious and we played a few of his songs too. He played the Guild on those tunes. He also did Neil Young's Harvest Moon. I finally learned the chords to the Rhythm Cafe song, Sunshine Lady. We did a rendition of Back to the City and he played a Yuke solo and pulled it off. I was cracking up. He can be so funny. He'd give me a high five and say, "We're getting the band back together and going to Japan!" A fellow named Chuck said, "I have a name for the band, the Dead Bananas." Bob was having fun and so were the rest of us.
Around 11 o'clock Don Quijano came in with several friends and introduced me to Kelly Eadon. Kelly is the lead guitarist in one of the top bands in the Philippines. He took up the Guild and we played two sets of Murat music and Kelly blew me away. He hit frets on my guitar that never been pressed before. I don't think he missed one fret or one note. If my guitar could talk it would have said to me, "You never played me like that! Or perhaps, " Don't touch me!" It is always a joy to be around great musicians and he is one, so is Don and his brother Oman. On the first test run of air play in the Philippines their new CD has 4 of the top 5 hit songs on it.
Yesterday we went to the Japanese Church in the International District watched their Christmas play. It was delightful. Don and Kelly played guitar for the performance and we stayed and had a Filipino feast afterwards. I spent the first part of the day over at Mike's exchanging hard drives and meeting his friend Don, who used to play lead guitar in one of Mike's bands. Don had some great toys, a Roland sound module for guitar with the pick up attachment. They were about to play around with some tracks for fun. I think they were going to play some passes of 911. We are certainly not short of performers or tracks. The first song I plan on wrapping up is Love Wears Your Name, which we refer to as City of Angels. It is sounding great and just needs the vocals redone. That will put one in the bag. Yea!
We are in Studio 04 as I write this. Scott MacGougan has been laying down tracks. Steel drums on Caribbean Islands, Strings on Love Wears Your Name and now strings on Naturally. He is a trooper. He played the whole night at Provinces with me and so did Jimmy Culler. It was a great night. We saw some new faces in the crowd. Bob Marcure and Dave Raynor did a few Rhythm Cafe classics: Bristol Bay, Sunshine Lady and Valley Island Lady. Had a nice chat with Bob at the end of the night talking about the gift of harmony, those who have it and those who don't. Kelly sang with Bob and with Jimmy, Scott and I. Music is good for the soul. Scott stayed over at our house so we could get and early start in the studio this morning. His wife, Deb, was not feeling well so we missed her company and she is all better today. I would like to have as many friends as are willing to take part in this recording. I could really picture Larry Mason and Carl Funk doing give us free and I hope they will come in and join the choir. Man does time fly by when you are recording. I have two gigs to look forward to tonight so I will have to leave after only 5 hours at Mike's. C'est la guerre.
December 16, 2004
Tomorrow night is Provinces. It should be an interesting weekend. Today was a weird day. That is all I have to say about that.
I remember in high school every wanted to study psychology. I think it was because they really wanted to sort out the messes in their own minds, but of course the reason given was to help humanity. I think, for me, the battle continues and it is between my heart and my mind. There are some things in life that don't resolve and we are left with an emptiness that will never quite go away. Art is a great release and healing balm for those feelings. One conflict that I personally encounter in the saga of the mind versus the heart is the the following. My heart sets me in motion and initiates actions of kindness with joy and abandon. Then my mind goes to work to dismantle the joy generating experience by pointing all the rewards I did not get for my efforts. Now my heart never wanted anything and if left to my mind alone, I would be very stump like in my actions because it operates a whole different level. I am slowly beginning to recognize this pattern of self attack for what it is. My heart is a much better guide than my head. It is also the harbor where a lot of pain has docked, however, I would not trade the pain for the absence of feeling. That is what makes life worth while, the emotions that we feel. Sometimes it is a lonely road to walk but there is a peace in giving and I say, as I talk to myself, look out mind, I am on to you so back off.
December 15, 2004
Last night was enjoyable. Ronnie laid down some tracks on Where Can I Find Love? and the we goofed around with some harmonies but we were all pretty tired and called it a night around 10:30. I hope to do some work at home over the next few days. Scott MacGougan said he would come up and put his two cents in and play, listen or contribute in any way he can. This is the double gig a day weekend so I am going to try to rest a little extra today and tomorrow.
I heard from Josh yesterday and he seems to be doing good and playing guitar quite a bit. He left me an impressive guitar message on my cell phone. I can tell he is practicing.
Days run together again and soon it will be Christmas and then a New Year. What lies in store? Mostly what will come from working and planning and having faith in our hopes and dreams. May they come to fruition. Let there be peace on earth. I am so thankful the friends who are helping share this gift of music with the world.
December 14, 2004
Ah the struggles of the mind are the toughest ones. It is funny the difficulty I have acknowledging God's hand in my life. The hope I struggle to have in Jesus. I don't pray very well because I have such a hard time concentrating. I start out talking to the Lord and seconds into it I am off on some care or worry and have forgotten I was even trying to have a conversation with my Heavenly Father. There have been some end time type torments going on in my thoughts of late. End time in the sense that I am not sure I can survive what goes on inside my own head. I get pulled out of depression reluctantly and my blind eyes slowly clear so I can see the goodness and mercy of God. He answers so many prayers. When we thought we would lose Dale, he answered our prayers and made him well. When we thought we would lose Andie He saved her for us. When I faced the anxiety I get from performing live in church that I shake so badly I cannot play, I asked for mercy and comfort and it came. I am sorry to say that I would have been right there with Thomas had I been alive in the days when Jesus walked the earth. Heck, I would have probably wanted DNA testing. But His mercy continues in spite of my struggles. I spend a great deal of time wishing things were different and letting go and acceptance come slowly to me. This is the season that we celebrate the birth of Jesus and the hope it brings. I long for that innocence of youth and for the child that hides within my heart to come out and play.
Larry Mason called me yesterday to fill me in on the progress with Celeste Music and Rhythm Cafe. He said it is still in the works but looks good for their distribution and licensing deal in Japan. We are bouncing off ideas for future possibilities now that we have a contact in Japan. I look forward to sending some music to Asia and to Europe and to South America. It is all a gift from God and not meant to be buried in the sand.
December 13, 2004
A new week and new hope. Bellingham was nice as always. It is a joy to play music with Paul and Kevin. I love the dim lighting in the church and Dave has done a wonderful job on sound. Every time we go there we see new toys. It has gotten down to plug and play which I really appreciate after driving so far. There is a spirit of peace that comes from the music and I am never sad that we went. I am wrestling the Christmas blues and I am down by 4 points in the third period. I hope to turn it around soon. Making music always helps. I'm not awake so I am going to stop now. Happy holidays.
December 12, 2004
It is early morning and the house is asleep along with the girls. I am awake and still a bit sleepy eyed. I stopped by Provinces for some dinner last night and Kenny made me a special dish that was exquisite. Brian Hartman was playing sax there last night with two very fine musicians on keyboards and drums. They sounded great. I stayed long enough to visit with Bryan and we talked about making him a CD and also having him join us for some songs on the project we are working on completing, two new CD's. It was one of those break conversations when you put off the balance for later because you want to try to say hi to as many people as possible. I will call him this week about getting together.
I had been planning on making an entry in the newsletter about Rhythm Cafe and their offer for licensing in Japan. Since the contact came via this website and my efforts to make the connection between Celeste Records and Larry, Bob and Deirdre, I had hoped to share in the good news when it came. Wrong. Kenny told me last night that Bob Marcure is very excited because they signed the papers and got the deal and will get distribution in Japan. How wonderful. Smile for the joy of others. I am glad I made the effort I did on their behalf, I told Kenny that all I wanted was to share in the good news and excitement, nothing more. He said, in the words of the song, let it go. So I shall. When we put conditions on situations we give them power to give us joy or give us grief. It certainly isn't like there are no times when I failed to follow through on what I said I would do. If one wears the coat of a victim, one will find an endless of reasons to continue to play the part, no matter how painful. So here is another version.
Guess what? A month or so ago I was contacted by Celeste Records in Japan because a Google search for Rhythm Cafe brought them to my website. Miya, the musical director from Celeste, said she was trying to track down Deirdre and Bob of Rhythm Cafe to offer to license their CD for sale in Japan. I responded the moment I got the email and said I would put her in touch with Larry Mason. I copied Larry in on all the e-mails, gave him the contact info and gave him a good email introduction to Miya. I then stepped back and waited for Larry to do his magic. And now a month later, while having dinner at Provinces, Kenny told me they got the deal! Rhythm Cafe's self titled CD will be distributed in Japan! Funny how things work out, isn't it. Who would have ever thought that I would play even a tiny tiny role in the success of Rhythm Cafe. It all started here at this little website. Congratulations and much success to Bob, Deirdre, and Larry.
December 11, 2004
The Christmas tree is up and decorated in beautiful symmetry by Andie and Liz. It was all done when I got home from Cafe de Paris. It is heavenly. It is a gray day in December and I wonder about destiny. I think of all the twists and turns in life. The choices we make, the roads we choose. I think that destiny is not preordained. I think it is something you make happen through work, faith and perseverance. So it isn't destiny at all. I think for some people life is a joy ride and for others it is a prison sentence. It is interesting to see that people in those opposite circumstantial positions can turn it all around through their own perspective and that a rich life does not require monetary worth, although that may come. I believe the richness comes from family and friends, from service and kindness and caring. If it was your destiny to be that kind of person, then it would be a good destiny. Some of us have to strive to make that happen in ourselves. Will we get there. I believe so, with work, faith and perseverance. Happy holidays. It is a good time to practice.
December 10, 2004
Just a quick one this morning. I had some time at the garage yesterday to write a bit. That is where I updated the newsletter, the flash poem and the journal. It is great because every time I go into the shop, they are done before me. I wondered around the tree farm in the pouring rain last night and found a beautiful tree, cut it and brought it home. Now the girls will work the magic on it. I feel just a tiny bit of the spirit creeping in now. I am getting ready but I have to run for now. One further note, I put up Christmas lights tonight, again, it was in the pouring rain. I was soaked through to my underwear by the time I was finished but I was singing carols in my head as I worked. Now it is off to Cafe de Paris. I think I will play some Christmas songs tonight. I don't really know in me but that's never stopped me before now. Thanks for the visit.
December 9, 200
Christmas is coming up fast and so far the spirit has eluded me. If I can finish my work on my car today I hope to hang some lights and pick up a tree. Andie is anxious to have one up and have a little decoration fun. I am not sure what it is about the lack of spirit. I would do well to avoid watching the news. It brings new meaning to the words of Love Me One More Time: The world's gone crazy and the world's gone mad. The increase of random acts of violence brings me back to an early journal entry when I talked about starting an organization of artists and musicians against violence. I have done nothing further to found that organization but I continue to write songs that carry a powerful message in that regard. I need to get over my own inhibitions and find a way to get this music out to the world. It is world music. We are truly one big family. Stevie Wonder won an award last night and he used his few moments at the podium to encourage singers, song writers and rappers to use their talents to help bring about awareness of the humanity we share and the need to love one another. I thought, if I could just hand him a recording of 911 it would go out around the world. Another artist who won awards thanked his personal savior, Jesus Christ. I admired his sharing the credits of his achievements. The Lord gives us all we have, too often I forget to quietly and personally acknowledge that fact. Dale sent me some information on how the 10 commandments are placed on buildings in Washington DC. How is it that the people who are offended by the 10 commandments are wielding so much power to suppress them. I know where their power is coming from and that is not the force that will save this country from the course it is on. This is the season in which we celebrate the birth of Christ and the hope of the world. Maybe more time spent on that fact will help me kick in the Christmas spirit. I hope so, because Christmas will be here and gone before I know it.
December 8, 2004
Who do you think the 5 people you meet in heaven would be? I didn't watch that movie the other night but I heard it was quite the emotional experience. I don't have any idea what heaven would be like. I spend some time, like Billy Crystal does, thinking about what it will be like to be dead. Well I suppose the body will be discarded but the spirit, what will that be like. I think the first thing that comes into my mind is flying. After our friend Don Perry passed away, we were all very sad. At the same time, he was one of those people who was so caring and giving and who was loved by so many that we experienced a sense of joy at knowing him mixed with the pain of losing him from our lives. A few days after he passed away I was thinking of him and wondering if he was happy were he was now. I was driving in the country and the wind was blowing strong and rain was pouring down. I looked up and saw a lone eagle circling low over head and just surfing the wind. I saw the eagle right at the moment I was wondering about Don. I got a very peaceful feeling and felt strongly in my heart that he was just fine. It is the same feeling I got when I was thinking about Frank and stumbled on the photograph on my laptop that I didn't even know was there. Serendipity.
December 7, 2004
The fountain babbles bringing tranquil soothing sounds to the morning. I think of my Uncle Frank who has crossed over to the next great adventure. I found a picture of him yesterday and he was young, full of life and he looked very happy. I never saw him look that way in life. I spoke to my father and asked him about Frank as a young man. He said he was very happy as a child. He lost his joy in Korea and in his first marriage is how the story goes. I like to think of him the way he was in that picture. I saw that young man lurking behind Frank's grown up eyes. War is a hard introduction into adulthood. I know for it was mine. I think the remainder of your life you feel a subtle awareness of danger: a feeling that everything isn't the way it seems. Peace begins in our own hearts and if we could find that and unite in that place of knowing and sharing peace we could change the world. God bless the happy child hidden in all our hearts.
December 6, 2004
There is an icy rain falling this morning and the smell of snow in the air. It is the beginning of a new week. I could take an eraser to most all of last week and never miss a thing. I have a lot to work through at this time and I have felt very alone in that effort. Andie and I are talking about our lives and what to do to make the best of how things are at the moment. I am trying to get a focus on this CD recording and get the joy out of the whole experience. It is the best when I am singing.
I hope we can get a tree up tomorrow. Liz decorated the house when we were at the Christmas party and it was beautiful to see when we got home. There is a lot of tension in the old home front but the atmosphere did a lot to off set it for a minute. Noel and Lois stopped by and we drank some wine and had a pleasant visit. Andie showed her film, The Mine Trip, and they all laughed like crazy through the whole thing. I was starting to nod off after we ate. I am still a bit beat by last week. I hope this new week brings new hope and mercy to this little planet where we reside for a time. God bless.
December 5, 2004
Last night was a great night for music. I played a set with just Manolito and I: nylon string guitar and flute. It was a very rich musical experience. I have played music with Manolito for over twenty years now and he never ceases to inspire and amaze me with his gift of music. Jimmy and Jamie joined me and we played instrumentals for another half hour and then sang a few classics like House at Pooh Corner. We also played City Of Angels. The Windermere crowd was very responsive. I used to only be able to see and hear the few jerks in an audience who had negative things to say. There were a few of those too, but we wiped off our nicks and bruises and played through it. Pick it up, turn up, turn down, slow it down, speed it up, play some Monkeys. I gratefully left the stage to the veteran classic rock performance of the Delivery Boys. They had the few hard cores who remained on their feet and dancing their booties off. It was an 8 hour day with load in and out and set up, tear down and the performance. The facility was beautiful but some of the staff at the Sandpoint Country Club sucked. God bless them though and I hope they keep their jobs and don't wind up homeless and unemployed.
It was a great party and the people seemed to genuinely enjoy themselves as did we. I am doing through a dark age and it shows I know. Jamie, at one point, leaned over to me and said, "Do you just sit around and get weird?" I said, "Yea, that's what I do." It was great to see Dave Noren again and listen to the magic he, Ronnie and Jamie have in their harmonies. Mike Daily was superb. He rocked and laid back. He played at a perfect level for the room and I always smile when I look back and see the joy on his face when he is playing drums. Jimmy gets better and better with each passing day and is Mr. Adaptability. He slides seamlessly from band to band and pumps that melodic bass beat into what ever is happening. Ronnie Llinas rocks on guitar and has such a warm spirit when he plays. Jamie, well what can you say, he is one of the brothers I never had in my family. The guy is a wall of talent and passion when it comes to music and life. It has been quite an experience to watch him grow and mature over all these years. He and Becky could just hire out to attend parties and together they would provide the entertainment with just their presence. Good friends and good music and good day.
How does one process the feelings of disillusionment? When someone you thought you knew, really doesn't even exist. The face that looks so lovely, resides behind a web of lies. You watch as the universe spins around that person. You are caught up in the gravity of the rotations and swept along helplessly. You feel the weight of each step you take increasing and the face you once saw gives place to something frightening and antagonizing. When you feel you want to run in terror and tell yourself the error of that action. Yet your whole being disagrees and the constant combat with yourself leaves you weary to the bone. You scrutinize your patterns and your actions from the past and you desperately want to gain understanding and let the past stay past and the new be new. But there is something wounded and uncontrolled running rampart in your head and the sense of joy that might be present has given way to dread. "No more rhymes, I mean it. Does anybody want a peanut?"
I guess those days off from writing arrived after all. I left my laptop at the studio all week. It was crazy anyway and I had no time to write. There is lots going on in our little part of the world. Chaos seems to be the energy flow of life lately. I have talked to so many people who are troubled. Troubled by the past, troubled by relationships, troubled by family, or work, or lack of work. I have been wrestling with anger of late. Anger over the circumstances that impact my life. Circumstances I have no say or control over. I guess it is time to work more on letting go and acceptance. I am not doing so hot. I would like to have more of a Jimmy Buffet life and less of a work myself to death one. But C'est la vie. I think life does run in circles and the past catches us in very different ways than we might expect. I know it has in my life. I feel for our friends who are parting ways and hope they find peace through it all. I say "pray" a lot. I probably should say I "wish" because I don't feel like I have a line open with God. It works good in print though. Perhaps it counts as a form of prayer. Who knows.
I have gotten several e-mails from my friend Erik. He is a young song writer inspired by Dave Matthews and he is on his way to making his place in music. He has that boundless enthusiasm and hope in his correspondence. His website is new and I have trouble fitting it on my screen and playing the music files, but I am sure he will have that fixed in a minute or two. It is honeststudio.com check it out. He has gotten over 500 email since he first put up the site.
It is probably just as well that I have taken this time off working on the website. I think life has turned upside down and I want it to be a good thing but I don't make changes well and since I have had a certain mind set that was a big part of my surviving the last decade or so I am trouble adjusting to a complete turn about and the idea of going through all that again. Life will be about done for me when I finish next time. Sometimes it feels like it is done already. But like the song says, I've got my lovely lady right here by my side, as long as that is the case I will be okay.
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Greg Murat (mur-rah)