Greg Murat (mur-rah)
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Journal July 2008
July 31, 2008
Last day of the month as I write and new month by the time I post it. I was a gaffer tonight for Sarah Murat on a film shoot she was doing at the old Tubs on 50th street in Seattle. It is used for a lot of films apparently. It was pretty nasty and we spent a few hours just sacking garbage. I asked Sarah if she wanted to go to Safeway first for supplies so we wouldn't have to leave all the gear unattended. She informed me she wasn't going to Safeway, I was. Oh, I get it, gaffer is Bostonian for Go for. The I went and picked up one of the actors whose name is Corviss. He was a very interesting fellow who had been teaching a class on awareness about Catrina and the impact it had on the country and his home in New Orleans. He was discussing his mentor program and added something about shooting someone or holding a robbery and I said excuse me. Then I realized he was talking about the screen play they were about to shoot. Once we arrived Sarah thanked me and sent me packing realizing how tired I was. I was fascinated by the whole thing and really wanted to stay but feared I might interfere just by being there so I headed home.
During the day I had several flashbacks on my life that were mostly not so happy. Just my ego asserting itself as I let it go for a higher plane. My perspective changed on some old wounding memories regarding my mother and father as I felt compassion over what they might have been feeling outside the universe I saw as my feelings. We all play roles, husbands, wives, mothers, fathers, friends, lovers but in the end they are all just roles. Parents play roles of failure in the wounded child's perspective, victim and perpetrator are other roles. My mother and father did the absolute best they could do and bless them for it. I do the same. When we spend so much time unaware of what we are doing and thinking it is almost impossible to be in the present enough to even influence our own actions. This is the moment, right now. Each breathe we breathe. Make it count. Life in every breathe.
I dreamed last night that Kayden and I were on a beach and a huge ( but cartoonish) passenger liner jet airplane was coming in low and I asked Kayden is this your dream and he said yes. I watched the plane touch the ground and skid towards where we were standing. We looked at each other and then back at the plane. There was no where to run. I held him tightly and thought how I said to him when he was born "I am going to take care of you." I said we are going to be okay but I knew in the realm of this world that we were not. We were bound for the next great adventure. Then the dream ended. I had been thinking for several nights that I wished I could go into his dreams and see what he saw that made him so afraid of airplanes. I believe I did. There was no fear in the dream, only acceptance. Inner peace. Life in every breathe.
July 22, 2008
Had a nice visit with Mike Daily tonight and we made a first pass set list for Cindy's Summertime Pig Roast on Whidbey Island August 17th. It was fun since we have about 3 CD's worth of material on Mike's computer at Studio 04 we could listen while we talked about the show. I had my Hernandez so I picked little parts for endings and segue's. So many songs and so little time. I am really looking forward to seeing Larry and Cindy and everyone else. I think it is great that we will be at the home of Love Stock for our 12th anniversary. It felt really good to be planning the show. I am getting more organized with my tunes. I have a master list that Elizabeth helped my type a few years ago. It will be a great concert. Speaking of concerts, Chani is going to see Judist Priest tonight and she tattooed one of their album covers on a DJ friend of hers. She was really stoked for the show. We just spoke briefly. Josh called me when I was at the studio but we didn't get to talk long and I didn't get an answer when I called him back. We mostly were chatting about Fedor and his last Ultimate Fighter championship. He sent me a link to the 35 second bought. He and Christina are huge fans. So that is it for today. I am tired but feeling better, ever day a little more present. A little more past is let go. Life is full circle and so it goes. I don't mind what happens.
July 21, 2008
A very special thanks to Shaker Boy Dale for keeping me on my toes when something goes sideways with the web site. You Rock!
The skies were relatively clear today. It has been one of those nearly perfect days that is warm with a cool breeze. Kayden's friend Tyler came over and they both were thoroughly entertained by Andie. When I came home from the nursery with an arm full of plants they were running and playing. Kayden jumped into my arms and said "I'm so glad to see you Papa!" Then he made sure I gave Tyler a big Papa hug too. They were running from the trampoline to the jungle gym to the play house. They had already gotten their afternoon swim in by the time I arrived. It made me think of how nice it is for Kayden to have a friend to play with here at the house. He does fine with us and with himself but today was great.
The weekend was very full. Saturday we went to the Gallup's Garden Party in Renton. Keith and Linda are great people and wonderful hosts. I am not sure how many different home brews Keith had made but I have a sampler with eight different flavors. I was one of the raffle winners for the third time. When Linda was giving out tickets I said "You better not give one to me." But she said "You have to take one." I won two beautiful pots of assorted flowers, a gift certificate(she had already gotten me hooked on gardening) an eight pack of beer, a box of Miracle Grow and a magazine to help with gardening ideas. It was quite a party. The Delivery Boys were playing and that included Ronnie, Dave, Mark and Jamie. They sounded great. I got to play some tambourine and sing some harmony with them and it was a lot of fun. Faith stayed with Kayden so Andie and I were on a very rare date. Ronnie's wife Tammy sang a tune with Boys and a lovely time was had by all. I did sing Cool Wind and Heaven in Your Eyes and heard a few fine folks at the party have kept the CD with those songs on it in continuos rotation. It stays in the car. My friend Steve and I sat at a table with his guitar while the boys were packing and sang a few tunes. What a great group of people. All kinds of people. Linda and Keith have a spectacularly landscaped yard and I took a bunch of close ups of the plants. I will post those later.
My laptop is really gimping along so I apologize to anyone who reads this stuff for slacking. I was in the Valley of the Shadow of Tears for a very long time. I woke up recently and thought, man it really stinks down here. I have been climbing ever since.
I got a call from Larry Mason and he informed me Cindy is in charge of a benefit for The Toddlers Learning Center. They decided this year to put the benefit on at the Love Shack, Larry's and Cindy's place on Whidbey Island and it happens to be on our anniversary and that happens to be where Andie and I got married. He invited the Papa Murat band to headline the show. Larry and Carl Funk will open, followed by another group and then we will do a one and a half to two hour show. Right now the band consists of Mike Daily on Drums & Vocals, Jimmy Culler on Bass & Vocals, and we are building from there. John Matthews is on a film shoot right now so we will find out about his schedule when he returns. I think Mr. MacGougan is out because he is music director of Covenant Church in Gig Harbor. August 17th is a Sunday so I am thinking there may be a conflict. We are going to hit it hard rehearsing for this very worthy cause and look forward to knowing who our soloist will be. We will do it either way. The event will be a Pig Roast and Auction and tickets are $100 per person. We are trying to raise $10,000. I heard our friends Tim and Lee were the first to commit. I am thinking of having a raffle and all my friends can throw in $10 and whoever pulls the winning ticket gets to go. We are still talking about this and as soon possible I will be making a flyer and seeking some outside sponsorship and donations. Our Kayden is extraordinarily special. We know first hand how much an organization Like Toddler's Learning Center, with people who understand little ones like him, can help. Watching a little human being blossom is a wondrous thing indeed.
Open up your calendar, your hearts, your wallets, your appetite and plan on making it August 17th Oak Harbor on Whidbey Island. I will share details as I get them.
Peace and Abundance
July 14, 2008
Another sunny day and what a difference it makes in everyone's disposition. The Fly In was great. It was a day full of music, fun, food, drink, and friends.
We met up at the airport around noon for setup but Mike Daily and Jimmy Culler had it planned and dialed in and so I just ran a few chords. The Delivery Boys were there, Ronnie, Dave and Jamie showed up and played Mike's drums during their set. Scott MacGougan made the drive all the way from Gig Harbor to play his amazing and very tasteful lead guitar and to shine his sweet spirit on all of us. John Matthews was there with his smiling face and new Roland Percussion pad, along with all his other gear of course. He was stellar. Jimmy Wright rocked the field. Dear friends were there. Jim , Mr. Best harmonica player in the world came with his new love Pamela and they both sat in with the band. For our part Papa Murat band played a two hour set and were able to mix up which made me happy but we rocked out the last of our set. Erik Helmerson showcased one of his songs, Walking Tall and then we stumbled through Love is Kind. I realized that at this point in time the stage not the place to rehearse. As Mike pointed out, every one up there paid a lot of dues and spent a lot of time learning the material and it shows. The camp fire is a great place for jamming but we have been rehearsing and I have been rehearsing myself. What a difference it makes. Dale Fuentes didn't make the show and won't be playing with us anymore as he is only doing jazz and shows with his very fine Latin Jazz Group Bahia. It was a fun ride. Jamie sang with us on our first set and it was nice to have the strong harmony. Jimmy had blown his voice the night before our show. Thanks to the many friends who came to see us. We love you.
Chani and Steve came all the way from a wedding in Tacoma to see the show and missed 9/10's of it but caught the last four rockers. Jimmy Wright took the stage next. He sure does rock the house. People go nuts over his very danceable music.
Andie's mom was spending the evening with Kayden so Andie got to get away and she danced her booty off. Mike's wife April was swing dancing with her and she was twirling Andie around like a rag doll. It was great to see her smiling and having fun. We never get out anymore, at least together. I saw Michael Clune, the man I played my first gig at Ricardo's with in a trio I dubbed Urban Jazz. It was him on Congas and flute and Steve Bartlett on bass. He is great guy and one of those friends I never see for such long periods of time. The day is a blur now as the weekend folds into another week. We did pool Jimmy Wright and Papa Murat band and added Chris on keyboards and that was fantastic. Man! He whipped out Desperado and he and I did the song right. I did a solo set the with just John Matthews on percussion and it was so sweet. I love John. We did Cabo San Lucas, Good Times are coming and an liltingly Latin folk version of Somewhere Over the Rainbow. I was thanking God for my fingers and my voice. It was so good to see everyone and meet new people and play music. Playing music with such people that I respect and love makes life worth while. I had suggested to Jimmy to invite Larry Mason and Carl Funk but his schedule and time didn't allow for that. It would have been a nice touch though.
The weather was hot and sunny but there was a great breeze (wind) blowing and that saved the day. Para-Phenalia was one of the main sponsors and they did the BBQ, food and beer up right. There were spectacular stunt pilots flying all day and we enjoyed them in spite of the noise except for one butt head he backed his plane up and spewed us all with nasty diesel smoke like you see when they are flying. That stuff is funky. It stinks and tastes terrible. But that was a tiny bump in a very smooth country road.
I am working on my pain body stuff. Leave the ego. Be at peace and practice acceptance. I am afraid there is a lot of stuff that pisses me off still. Although it is illusion it feels mighty real to me. Still I am struggling and still I am learning to let it go. Not as fast as my ego wants because it projects the success or failure into the future where it will remain forever. At this moment I am at peace clicking on this keypad. Writing.
July 5, 2008
We are heading home now persuaded by swollen eyes and wheezing lungs. The man at the corner store said he can't keep Benadryl in stock because so many people are suffering from allergies. It is weird but is really awful. All the mind stuff I have thrown at it is just like flame on a fire. It just gets worse and worse. I mean it is getting better and better. Good air and good breathe is coming my way. Kayden is already asleep as we race towards the ferry. Will we make it. Will a warm shower be mine tonight. I feel badly as Andie has looked forward to this time so much. Kayden and I have been so bad it pretty much spoiled it for her. She says we can have a do over.
July 4, 2008
Journaling is great therapy even if you get a lot of crap for doing it. It is not really funny how people dig at each other without realizing it. It is obvious when you look at the number of people who stop being together rather than stopping the mindless criticism. And, never mind. It is a new day. The rain was refreshing and knocked the pollen out of air. Kayden and I have had a rough go of it. He looks like he has been in street fight his little eyes are so puffed up. Allergies. Paul Simon described it best when he said "something's living on my skin." Kayden and I climbed down the cliff this morning and caught baby crabs. He named them poop crabs since they all pooped little orange juice onto his hands. He didn't squash one of them and after we climbed back from the water we let them go. He also poked his finger in 300 anemones and watched them squirt water and squeeze his finger. Now we are being driven down someone else's driveway because the driveway is blocked by a car left by a drunk driver the sheriff pulled over last night. Apparently the sheriff left the lights on the whole time and when he came back to have to the car moved the battery was dead. So Lopez style he left it there. Imagine a sheriff or tow truck with no jumper cables. It is 9 am now. My pain body is jumping with energy over the whole situation. Now we are heading to town to see if we missed the parade.
Happy birthday Kathy. A holiday girl. Thanks again to Dale for letting me know my site was hacked. I am very disappointed with the service I got from Ipower Web and don't think I will use them to host anymore websites and I am searching for a new host for myself and my other clients. I don't know if the hack was through their server, MySpace or my site. I hope no one's computer suffered as a result of some ass's perverted pass time. It is proof that there is no dumb ass vaccine and mutants are alive and well on planet earth.
I am happy for the people who have dual citizenship and the freedom that provides. Sarah's friend in France has Irish citizenship so he can live in France where as an American he could not. GB has done so very much to make American's unwelcome in the better part of the world. It is amazing how many guilty people go freely walking about causing pain and suffering while jails are overcrowded with people who used natural herbs to alter their consciousness for better or worse. The Tao says everything is as it should be though.
We have now seen the Lopez Island parade. OKAY then. We had the BBQ. All right then. Now we are driving back to the cabin. The plan is to come back and get situated for the evening fireworks The allergies are returning. Both Kayden's and my eyes are itching like crazy. This is the most people we have ever seen stirring about on the island. I asked the Sheriff about the car blocking the entrance to the cabin. He rolled his eyes and said "That was moved hours ago." About 11 hours after he left it there and was that liquor I smelled on his breathe. Probably not but sure seemed like it. It is so laid back here. There is a lot of creativity. We saw a band that used to play at Provinces. They sounded good but looked bored. They played the most bazaar version of Joker by Steve Miller, different chords and melody completely. Cool in a strange way. The bas player is great at creating rhythm on the boss pedal Andie got me. Now I know why it works so well. It quantized. Can't wait to try it my own self. Kayden has fallen asleep. It is 2 pm island time. We are going back to the cabin to let missy out to go potty. I have the one day camping crusties and looking forward to a few more. Even the cows are sleeping in the fields here. During the parade Kayden got doused by some bunghole on a float. She threw a cup of water at her friend who was stand besides us and nailed us instead. He was a good sport though.
There is a lot of fascinating reading about our being, spirit or essence that is reminiscent of earlier studies in psychiatry and psychology. It really boils down to the body and mind, the spirit or being and that old ego. Now the little or big voice in your head that says demeaning things and inflates or deflates your sense of self is referred to by Eckhart Tolle as the pain body. Now the older you get the more conscious you are of the pain body only that is not what he refers. In the stillness you can know and hear God. There is not much stillness if you cannot shut off your mind. That is where meditation and prayer can come into play. It is really challenging for me to stop all thoughts. Being present means leaving the future and past for the present. That is all there really is anyway. Now in this present moment my eyes nose and face itch so much that I want to peel them. Eckhart says there are no problems only situations. This situation sucks. I am taking enzymes, herbs, silver water and I have sunk to Benadryl, For whatever harm it may do at least it knocks me out. Some times that is just what the situation calls. I know from all my reading that stress and holding onto the past is what causes cancer, kidney stones and all other ailments. I think that is what Jesus was talking about when he said if your arm offends you chop it off. Thank goodness it is thoughts and not appendages that are causing my problems or I would a headless, limbless torso. Make peace with yourself someone said. Good idea.
July 1, 2008 Fixing stuff. It may take a moment or two. Please empty your cache if you have visited this site in the last few weeks and run a virus scan. I was hacked.
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